The pathway that lead to me becoming a sexologist with both expertise and experience started with my own sexual issues. I don’t feel like I’ve arrived but hope to be moving forward for the rest of my life. Sex is the most obvious expression of the creative life force within each of us. Many people have found that in accepting and owning it they feel more personally grounded and calm. They have felt more alive with an energy and permission to be more personally creative. I found myself writing more, exploring art and music and enjoying life more. I also felt more authentic and that I could be present in more personal integrity. I apologised less for myself.
I am hugely appreciative of a wonderful and supportive wife who has shared both the pain and the pleasures of this journey with me. Together we have confronted the obvious and subtle ways in which we are repressed and shut down. This has really helped me in understanding the issues between couples.
We worked together in Africa for many years teaching on sex and marriage as well as counselling couples and individuals. Working cross-culturally and dealing with the dynamics of mixed race marriages was very challenging and gave us insights into different world views. It was this that convinced me to aim for long-term transformation for my clients and not short-lived solutions.
Several years ago I decided that sexuality was the area I wanted to specialise in and discovered the world of sexology. I have read extensively around the subject and studied it professionally. I am a lifelong learner and constantly curious. Wherever possible I have tried to get first hand experience to back up my knowledge.